So the Aussie who nearly killed me in my sleep from part one of this story, he tells me one day that if you eat twelve carrots you get a disease called Carotitus (or some shit) and you turn orange. I told him that was the dumbest thing I ever heard. He told me he knew...
So I’m at some really posh pool party at a joint called Skybar at the Mondrian hotel in West Hollywood and my buddy Eric Sharp is DJing and the crowd is a collection of the most sexually frustrating outfitted human beings on earth. I’m sitting down...
I had no idea what to do or where to leave my bag or if any of my belongings were safe in the room so at 10am or so I opened the door slowly, backpack on back, looked both ways before crossing the hallway to make sure that British sounding drunk dude that nearly...
I was spare changing on Thayer street outside of the Brown University Bookstore and had the sudden urge to read Of Mice And Men by John Steinbeck. I stole a book from that store roughly… Hmmm… A couple times per week. My backpack was full of books,...
I threw the dinner table over and finished that scene from A Streetcar Named Desire where Stanley flips his lid at Blanche for the first time at the dinner table. It was an intense scene and i had teared and grabbed my wife’s tits during the scene in front of the...
So I’m at this bar in Hell’s Kitchen with my co-star of a play I was performing in at the time called Tape, by Stephen Belber, when Duane, my co-star, says in a thick New York accent (even though he’s from Rhode Island) Don’t worry. I’ll...
“Stay just one more night” Lucy, the Ivy-League girl I fell in love with that one night I was sitting on my Indian-print blanket asking strangers for money with my witty signs ‘need money for beer pot and hookers’, the girl I was tellin you about...
So i’m a homeless sixteen year-old runaway that had just escaped from Hidden Lake Academy and was now spare changing with my homegirl, Flower, on the streets of Providence Rhode Island when I looked up from my Indian-print blanket, which I was sitting on while burning...
He was wearing three hoodies and two pairs of pants with his hood over his face holding a shopping bag. I couldn’t see his face in the dark. We were outside the Flatiron Mall in Broomfield Colorado. I was 18. He told me to “Put the money on the...
We were fucked. It had been a wonderful experience. For three hours. Until my transmission blew out in Kingman Arizona and we tried watching video tutorials on how to fix a transmission on YouTube. Turns out rebuilding a transmission ain’t so easy. Luckily,...
