Scrambled Gregs: Funny Short Stories About Life
I write about my life. Some people like that shit. My question to you… Do you ever get REALLY fuckin bored? Great news. I made a welcome kit thingy for ya. It’ll soothe your soul.
Most Recent Posts
These are the most recent posts, but you may wanna scroll a bit further down to view all the genres. Sometimes I go on a binge about how to do shit and only write about that for a month, then other times I only write about sex or illegal activities. Sometimes I write about being sober. I write about all sortsa shit so the point of this blurb is to let you know that while the most recent posts are the most recent, they in no way reflect what this site has to offer. This site is a mish-mash of enormous proportions. So, pick and choose as you will…
Travel Therapy: Self-Administered Counseling
Estimated reading time: 6 minutes Is Travel Healthy? When I was fourteen, I was kicked out of high school in the middle of ninth grade and went to rehab in Minnesota for thirty days. While there, I fell in love with a nineteen-year-old heroin-addicted hippie chick...
Almost a Criminal
Part 1 The restaurant was called Balzano’s, and it had just opened. All the employees were new, especially me—at least that’s what it felt like. I told KC how incredible it was, how I miraculously pulled off the pizza-boy to trendiest restaurant in Manhattan switch,...
How I dislocated my shoulder
I dislocated my shoulder cause of Jerry. It happened outside Nassau Community College. I had just moved back home to Long Island from Boulder, Colorado. I was twenty years old. I signed up for acting classes and so that’s why I was at the college. One day, outside the...
The Secret to Backpacking Trips
The hardest part about backpacking trips are pulling the trigger. I was at a diner in Manhattan with my friend Tyler once. We couldn’t afford anything on the menu. We were in the Turtle Bay section of the city. We ordered something menial to not look like bums....
How to Plan a Road Trip Without Planning Shit
How to plan a road trip has nothing to do with where you’re going. In early spring of 2014, I had no idea where to go, but I had to leave LA fast. I couldn’t take it anymore; I needed outta California. I couldn’t relapse, no. That’s not an option. No drink for me. It...
Best Road Trips in the USA
Yeah, so I do have the Guinness World Record for longest road trip in the US, which in itself has given me enough to write a blog about on the best road trips in the USA, but even before I broke the world record road trip, I’d grown up on the road and spent many...
Camping Hacks for 9 to 5ers
When I was sixteen I was sent to a wilderness program in Utah where I was told to learn how to survive in the woods with nothing other than a knife. Dig your own latrine, whittle the wood needed for a bow drill set, create an ember with that bow drill set, use the...
Travel Hacks for Aspiring Nomads
When I was fourteen in my first rehab in Minnesota with nothing other than a piece of paper and my imagination, I began dreaming of freedom. By the time I reached my second rehab in Louisiana when I was fifteen, I had immaculate plans to run away and be liberated once...
What’s a Hostel? Let’s Find Out…
My First Time Staying in a Hostel I had always wanted to experience a hostel. What's a hostel really like? Are they grimy? Creepy? Normal? Dirty? Clean? Amazing? I had no idea, but I had to find out. And afterwards, staying in hostels became a way of life for me. But...
How to Stop Smoking Weed
I stopped smoking weed and drinking and doing coke and all that shit about nine years ago, but that’s cause I was a degenerate drug addicted fuckhole and sought serious help. But it dawned on me that not everyone that is searching for a weed substitute and looking for...
The Drifter Chronicles
This is my three-volume memoir about my fucked up life and how I managed to salvage my future. Rated R. Completely profane. Limited plot. Reader beware. Only buy if you can stomach a sad tale told with teenage angst and a tinge of dark humor.
Blog Posts & Short Stories
I write about all sortsa shit: travel, sex, insecurity, public humiliation, childhood trauma, illegal shit I’ve done in the past, getting sober, and interesting encounters with inspiring (or damaging) people in unlikely circumstances. You can choose your own adventure below by genre.
Dirty Sex Stories
I love sex and I love writing about it. Some of the sexual experiences I’ve had were totally inappropriate, while others were absolutely called for. Sometimes I’m a dick, sometimes I get dicked (not literally). Anyway, if you’re horny and want something to rev your ovaries, check out some of these stories…
Crazy-Ass Relationships
Moving on to some crazy-ass relationships… many of these stories are incredibly twisted. I would go so far as to say there’s some pretty fucked up shit in this category… but nevertheless, sometimes unhealthy relationships form and ya just gotta eat ’em up. If you wanna read some raw shit, feast up.
Being Homeless
Yeah so I was a sixteen-year-old homeless hippie vagabond fuck when I was younger and that’s where a lot of foundation was laid… So, if you wanna know what it’s like digging through the trash to get a Whopper on 9/11 when you’re an (ex)vegetarian beatnik, these stories are for you…
Travel
Did I mention I have the Guinness World Record for longest road trip? That’s a humble-not-so-humble brag. Yeah, but before I was a world-famous roadtripper I was hitchhiking the country, hopping Greyhound buses, and squatting at hostels all over. Here are some crazy travel stories for ya…
Life Questions
I know what you’re thinking. You wanna know the meaning of life. Well, that’s good, cause I’ve come up with an answer for you… The meaning of life is to massage the souls of as many strangers as possible. Thus, this section of blog posts, made to massage your soul, today.
Vagabonding
Wanna know how to vagabond the world and sleep with strangers in hostel bathrooms while still making sure you visit old town Toledo before you leave Spain? Well, that’s what this section is all about: how to vagabond (not travel), how to experience (not vacation).
PREMIUM SHIT
Some posts are for everyone, and some posts are for the hungry-as-fuck. If you’d like to go a bit deeper and read shit that’s not just entertaining, but might actually change your mood, give you some insight, or help you feel less alone, this is where you belong.
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How It All Started
This blog is based off of many fucked up experiences, some pretty, some not so nice. But if you wanna know how it all started, try reading Chapter Zero below…